AAllure Lifestylers   
A members club for couples, trios and single females (no single males) who wish to share in adult intimacy at venues in the Metro NYC, NNJ and NEPA areas. The club encourages members to explore all aspects of sensual pleasure and human sexuality, providing a positive and non-threatening forum. AAllure organizes gatherings to explore, exchange and share in various human sexual behaviors in a safe, discreet and non-judgmental way. Whether you wish to participate or observe, AAllure provides a venue where open-minded people can meet like-minded people for on-premises adult fun.

Bi Swinger   
Bi Swinger, a NASCA International member organization, is a New York City based private bisexual swing club affiliated with Bi Nation, the world's largest co-ed bisexual community. Since December 2002, we have had upscale private bi-friendly on-premise parties at deluxe hotel suites, luxury lofts, and penthouse apartments in mid-town Manhattan.

Our parties are at a new luxury loft in Midtown Manhattan on 31st Street off Fifth Avenue. This new 3,000 s.f. loft has a huge main area with plenty of sofas, state-of-the-art music and video system, five lounge rooms, two bath rooms, locker room for clothes check and a group shower. We supply robes for your comfort and condoms for your safety. We have a sumptuous buffet and chocolate covered strawberries, and a bar with beverages and BYOB. We also have entertainment including complimentary tantric massage, adult video, stage dancing, live music and body painting.

Minimum age to attend is 21.

All members at our Bi Swinger Parties are screened. You should email a recent picture and description to BiSwingerParty@Yahoo.com Please include your first name, age, location, height and weight, occupation or education, and sexual orientation. We do not circulate pictures of members or disclose any personal information. After you have been screened and approved, you will be given a link to our discreet Members Only Page for prepayment of the deposit or membership and admission fees by secure Internet check processing or by major credit card.

We also accept complete profiles and pics from swingersdateclub.com, lifestylelounge.com, swinglifestyle.com, swappernet.com, adultfriendfinder.com, nerve.com and Yahoo!.

Testimonials from Recent Parties:

We had a great time on Saturday night [August 7, 2004]. We will definitely come back. The place was hopping and there were plenty of couples to "play" with. The club was clean and well organized. Shel was a great hostess. We look forward to the next one."
Adult Friend Finder 'nyfuncouple00', Mid-Hudson Valley, NY

"Thanks for the fun party -- we had a very nice time. We'd be into a Labor Day party."
Swingers Date Club 'ZOOG89', Great Neck, LI

"...for some reason the pot really starts to bubble over towards the end. Good lord, there was more unbridled debauchery running amok in those final two hours than you could shake a stick at...holy guacamole! The music was great, the drinks didn't stop, and there was more sin per square foot than I care to detail."
Alex the Cowboy, Astoria

"Fellow kinksters! We just want to report on the loft party Premium Events. Wow! This is a terrific place to meet and play with couples. Very friendly staff makes it easy to feel at home. $60 for couples if paid in advance is a great value! The dungeon space needs some work, but it does give kinksters a special place to play. Anton of Sexy Spirits was there and definitely the highlight of the evening for Ruby. She's still gushing and gushing over his juicy fabulous tantric massage, and do we mean tantric with the big O at the end, the finest kind. A thousand kisses, Anton! This party definitely got these Slave Swappers fully aroused, erect and ready for more."
James & Ruby, Slave Swapper Parties

"It has truly been a divine pleasure offering you a loving touch at these great parties and I intend to continue supporting Lou and all his efforts in making this party be incredibly affordable with carefully screened attendees, great entertainment, and food and drinks that outdo any play party I have ever been to in the Big Apple."
Anton, founder of Sexy Spirits, Columbus Circle

"Lindsey and I had a blast at the last party."
Goddess Topaz

"We had a great time at Saturdays event [July 24, 2004]. There were a lot of sexy people engaging in some very erotic play that heightened our sexual passion immensely. The loft is also well designed to allow you to indulge any fantasy you desire. There are already plenty of women doing each other for real. We did fuck like animals all evening. We'll be certain to attend the next event."
Michael & BJ, Downtown Manhattan

"Good party [July 24, 2004] The music was the best we've heard at a swing club (i.e. Soft Cell, Siouxsie And The Banshees, et al....)"
P & M, Yahoo! ID 'Martoocha', Williamsburg, Brooklyn

"We had a great time. Hot decadent party - good mix. Please invite us to your other functions."
Swingers Date Club Bronxville, NY

"I had a great time [May 15, 2004 Loft Party]... I will definitely be back!!"
Vicky, Brooklyn

"We had a great time and the loft was a perfect location. Hope to enjoy another party soon."
Ethan & Becca

"Thank you very much for such an awesome party... We had so much fun... It was our first swingers party and not our last..... Tell your body art painter [Rainbow Heart] that I LOVED my "LIPS"... See you soon,"
Jasmine, Wendy, & Lindy

"I wanted to thank you again for a wonderful evening. Initially, I wasn't certain if anything was going to happen, but that group shower was a simple yet brilliant plan on your part. I made a great connection with Emma, the voluptuous woman with the big tits. We exchanged email addresses that night and hopefully when I'm down in NYC again we'll get together."
R., Toronto

"...last Saturday nights party was your best EVER. The sexual energy that was there was just incredible! And of course the couples and the beautiful sexy bi-women were absolutely amazing. My date had only wanted to attend to observe and to satisfy her bi-sexuality. As all could see she did more than just watch! Thanks again for a great party!"
H & J, Brooklyn

"My wife and I wanted to thank you again for the party on Saturday the 7th! We had a great time, got to meet some fun, sexy, hot bi couples, and to just let go! We will DEFINITELY cum back!"
P & J, Long Island
"Last night was our first time to one of your parties and we had a GREAT time."
J & D, Westchester

"Truly one of your best, the couples and the single girls that attended really made the party. We had a great time..."
H & R, Brooklyn

"Thank you once again for putting together another great evening. We had another great time and met some very nice people. We are planning to be at the next party."
S & C, Long Island

Hawk Magazine, August 2004, pp. 90-95
"Swing is in the Air - There is a NEW SWING SCENE and you won't believe who's involved!",

... "Young people are more interested in sexual exploration and swing parties than ever," says Lou, who hosts New York City based swing parties as head of BiNation.org and BiSwinger.com. "I have seen a significant increase among the early-to- mid-20's and 30's. There is an incredible increase in finding bi-females for threesomes." On his site alone, the Bisexual Threesome [Yahoo] group has over 10,000 members. That's a lot of hot action.

Lou is an old pro on the swing scene. Besides the party where the buxom babe took on all comers, which he hosted, he's been swapping...since the heady days of the early 80's at New York City's infamous orgy den Plato's Retreat. "Plato's Retreat was to the swing scene what Elvis was to Rock 'n' Roll. First of all, the legendary Plato's was enormous," Lou says. "You walked in and there was a huge dance floor and disco. There were huge locker rooms and even an Olympic-sized swimming pool for nude bathing...none of the clubs in New York City compare in size to Plato's. Today, there is a trend way from the huge glittery, disco-style swing clubs and towards the smaller, more intimate private swing parties. Quality couples want to go to a swinging party where they know all the members are screened and where they will meet other attractive, in-shape couples."

... Some people come to these parties to watch. Participation is encouraged, but it's not mandatory. "Being a voyeur is part of the excitement of going to a swinger party," admits Lou of BiSwinger.com. "We sometimes have new members who just come as voyeurs and never get undressed or engage in any sex. Watching these parties in action is hotter than any triple-X video you will ever see. Often members start out as voyeurs, but with all the sexual energy around them, they get horny, and before long they take off their clothes and join in the action."

JanesGuide.com - Jane's Regional Guide:
New York Swing Clubs/Groups
Bi Swinger - New York City
Mini Review - This is an on premises swing club organized for bisexual people of both genders. Single men and women are both admitted as well as couples. The website has 3-4 pages of information on how to join, the calendar of events and what to expect at a party. It's great to see bisexual men finally getting accepted by small parts of the swing community.
Cost: Free Date Reviewed: 06/04/2004 Advertising Content: Low
Categories Swingers - Clubs

Playground Magazine, New York, Volume 2, Issue Four, June 2004
Lascivious Listings, pp 42-43

Bi Swinger

BiSwinger.com , a NASCA International member organization, is a New York City-based private bisexual swing club affiliated with BiNation.org , the world's largest co-ed bisexual Yahoo community. The Bi Swinger parties have been written up in Details magazine and Eros.com. Since December 2002, Bi Swinger has had upscale private bi-friendly on-premise parties at luxury hotel suites in mid-town Manhattan. Minimum age to attend is 21. The Bi Swinger parties have couples with bi-females and single bi-females with ages ranging 21 to mid-40's. The parties include light food, beverages, an open bar and tantric massage.
Bi Swinger screens all of their members and has a more select, attractive and sexy crowd then what you would find at the commercial swing clubs and most private swinger parties. All members are screened based on their pictures and description, including age, location, height and weight, occupation or education, and sexual orientation. They seek attractive, open-minded members who are easy to get along with in a group environment, as well as intelligent, sophisticated individuals for an eclectic mix. Bi Swinger does not circulate pictures of its members or disclose any personal information.

The atmosphere at the Bi Swinger parties is intimate and friendly. The parties start out like any other social mixer or cocktail party with people drinking, eating and talking. The Bi Swinger members are just as interested in meeting other people for friendship, as they are in intimate encounters, and often exchange email addresses and phone numbers. It's a no pressure environment conducive to newbies and more seasoned swingers alike. They don't require that you get undressed in the parlor room, but in the bedroom areas street clothes aren't allowed. Bi Swinger is a cutting edge swingers club that is gender bending, accepting safe heterosexual, bi-female and bi-male play, and shedding any taboos. As the night goes on, the parties get very sexually charged with almost everyone getting naked and partaking in every imaginable sexual combination, including sixty-nine between bi-females, strap-on dildo play, MFF threesomes, and couples four-somes.. Bi Swinger supplies condoms and lube, as they expect that everyone practice safe sex and not engage in risky behavior.

Eros.com, Eros Guide New York, January 2, 2004
Burgeoning Bisexuality, Bis are finally invited to come out of the closet, by Abby Ehmann.

"Lou, a bisexual male in his 40s, made the decision to found a formalized bisexual group after one particularly exciting evening in the summer of 2002. Lou was partying with a female artist friend and lover who revealed that while she had had several long-term relationships with men, she also had several female lovers. "I told her that I, too, am bisexual and she was surprised," Lou explains. "My friend then told me she was really turned on by a mutual friend of ours," Lou says, so he arranged a get-together. "I called up our mutual friend and invited her to party with us. As the night went on, we got more horny and uninhibited, and we eventually experienced every imaginable threesome combination. We watched the sun rise, our naked bodies pretzeled together, and joked about how we'd known each other for several years, but had not known that the others were bisexual."

This led Lou to start the Bisexual New York City Yahoo group in October 2002. He soon formed two additional groups, Bisexual Adult and Bisexual Threesomes, which really took off. Within months he had added groups for every state in the U.S. and for countries all over the world, plus special interest bisexual groups, including Bisexual Orgy, Bisexual Married, Bisexual Friends, Bisexual Singles, Bisexual Women for Couples, Bisexual Men for Couples, Bisexual Fetish and Bisexual Transgender. When it comes to sexuality, there seem to be endless permutations, both geographical and preferential.

Once there were almost 100 Yahoo groups, they became difficult to manage, so Lou set up www.BiNation.org to make it easier for people to join the groups. The Bi Nation Yahoo bisexual groups now have over 125,000 subscribers.

"New York is definitely becoming more bi," Lou tells me. "When I frequented Plato's Retreat in the 1980's, it was very heterosexual. The bath houses were all gay." Another experience back in the 80's proved that the two worlds could coexist. "When I was in San Francisco in the 1980's, they had a co-ed bath house which was great for a bisexual like myself, as I was able to have sex with both women and men under one roof."

But Manhattan establishments don't go quite as far as Lou would like. Two years ago, he tells me, "I went to La Trapeze with two female lovers. We met an Italian couple and all five of us went to a room together." After great sex with the woman, Lou chose to sit back and watch the girls play with each other. But he and the other gentleman didn't make any contact. "I was thinking of grabbing the Italian guy's cock, but held back. I knew that at all these clubs it was very taboo for a man to even touch another man. I was disgusted at how these clubs have a double standard on bi-male play, that they were not very liberated and were homophobic." Contact between females is always popular, though: "These days, when I go to the swing clubs in New York, especially Checkmates, there is a lot of bi-female play."

Lou decided "it was time for the bisexuals to have their OWN party, so I started the first bisexual party in New York City." Lou's Bi Nation throws monthly parties in luxury hotel suites. "As the parties became more popular, I set up another web page www.BiSwinger.com, so that people could get more information on the events. Bi Nation / BiSwinger.com is now a NASCA member and listed in the national directory of swing clubs."

Details Magazine, by Conde Nast Publications, September, 2003, pp 147-148
"Does Bisexuality Really Exist"

"If some men are sneaking around, others are joining the party - literally. Lou runs BiNation.org, an association of Yahoo groups. A veteran of the legendary seventies swingers club Plato's Retreat, Lou organizes regular - but discreet - bi swinger sex parties at upscale locations like New York luxury hotels. He says he gets all ages from all walks of life ("bankers to lawyers to firemen") at these events, which have a stringent application procedure (namely, pictures), particularly for the men. "We have about 10 people in their twenties [included at our typical party]," he notes. "The women enjoy seeing their boyfriends getting sucked off by another guy. My forty something generation is not as comfortable with bisexuality."

Frequently Asked Questions:

How are the parties different then other swinger parties and commercial swing clubs?

* Our parties are held at the most luxurious, immaculate, and fully equipped alternative loft space in Manhattan. This new 3,000 s.f. full floor loft includes a full kitchen and bar, two bathrooms, shower facilities and clothes check. We also have a dungeon room to accommodate the fetish and BDSM communities, and a tantric massage area. The atmosphere is more intimate and friendly then a commercial swinger club. You receive personal attention from our beautiful and gracious hostesses many of whom work as models and actresses. Our crowd is youthful, attractive and hot and rivals any of the more exclusive private swinger parties in the New York area. We openly accept bisexuality among both females and males.

What are the parties like?

* The parties start at like any other social mixer or cocktail party with people drinking, eating, dancing and talking. We have a fully stocked BYOB bar and offer a lavish catered hot and cold buffet. We always have a combination of returnees and new Members. Our Members are just as interested in meeting other people for friendship, as they are in intimate encounters, and often exchange email addresses and phone numbers. Newbies and voyeurs are welcome, as well as more seasoned swingers. We have a no pressure environment and do not compel anyone to get undressed, but in the lounge areas we encourage wearing lingerie or robes and nudity. As the evening progresses, our parties become more sexually charged and very hot. Many of the couples enjoy just having sex together in a free and open sexual environment, while other couples and singles selectively find new partners for sexual exploration. Our parties are not orgies or a free-for-all.

Is safe sex practiced?

* Yes, we expect that everybody practice safe sex and not engage in any risky behavior. We supply condoms and lube for your pleasure and protection. All Members must accept ultimate responsibility for their personal safety.

What is the average age, occupations, demographics and sexuality?

* Most people at our parties are 21 to 45, with an average age in the early 30's. Occupations include business owner, medical doctor, attorney, college professor, investment banker, art director, construction worker, NYC fireman and graduate student. The demographics are approximately 40% Manhattan, 20% New Jersey, 20% Brooklyn, Queens and Bronx, 10% Rockland, Westchester and Connecticut, and 10% Long Island. We have also had out-of-towners from Miami, Toronto, California, Oregon, Washington DC, Virginia and Great Britain. Most of our couples are bisexual females and straight males, but many are bi couples (both partners are bisexual) and straight couples (both couples are hetero). Most single females are bisexual, but some are straight or lesbian.

How do you screen members?

* As a private membership club, we screen all of our members and have a more select, attractive and sexy crowd then what you would find at any of the commercial swinger clubs and most other private swinger parties. All members are carefully screened based on their pictures and descriptions, including age, location, height and weight, occupation or education, and sexual orientation. We are interested in members who are open minded, sensual, sexual, physically fit, height/weight proportionate, very attractive, intelligent, well educated, youthful, personable, interesting and sophisticated.

What is your Cancellation and refund Policy?

* You may cancel for any reason up to 24 hours prior to the start of the Party and receive a full credit towards a future party. All cancellations should be emailed to RSVP@BiSwinger.com

What are other rules?

* 1.) No smoking of cigarettes, except in designated areas.
* 2.) No use or possession of drugs of any kind, including marijuana.
* 3.) No nonconsensual touching or groping of another person.
* 4.) No cameras, sound recording devices, camcorders, or cellular phones.
* 5.) No solicitation, prostitution or professional escorts.
* 6.) No casual jeans or sneakers.

CandleLight Associates   
"Swinging is an Attitude, not an Activity"

Ready for your first party?? Call us at (585) 334-8785. We need to speak to both of you to verify that you are a couple. (Singles need to be sponsored by a member couple)

Candle Light Associates, Inc. is an adult club in the Rochester, New York area. The club is founded by people who share common interests. We are long time members of the lifestyle and are active participants. We believe that, "sex is the extension of friendship and not the cause of it." We also believe that swinging is an attitude, not an activity. We enjoy meeting couples who are secure in their relationships with each other. We are not interested in cheaters. Swingers don't cheat, Cheaters don't swing.

The Candle Light's function is to provide an atmosphere where consenting adults may meet. We are "classy" people and not interested in brash or hurtful behavior that would embarrass themselves or others. Our personalities are a blend of fun loving, sincere, open and honest people, who will not mislead others into believing things that are not true. We are adventurous and like the 'turn-on" of trying new things and seeing new places.

Are you ready to be a swinger?


The swingers pendulum follows through a wide arc. At one apex are those who consider swinging the most advanced sign of maturity. At the other pole are conservatives who abhor swinging and label it bad, immoral, degrading, animalisticyou get the picture. In the middle, humanistic psychologists and psychiatrists picture swinging as the fulfillment of our unlived exploratory sex life. They say you "should" be able to engage in it comfortably, then take it or leave it.

Couples who have successfully made the swinging scene tend to have a firm primary relationship. The main hindrance to swinging stems from feelings of inferiority, possessiveness and sexual exclusivity. With the addition of swinging, a stable relationship (outside of sex remains that way and shaky sexual or non sexual problems are magnified.

Whatever your views, here is an introductory quiz that will compare your attitudes with those who have successfully embraced swinging. Choose a response that most closely represents your feelings or reaction:

1. Your partner suggests that the two of you join a swing club. You:

Are horrified.
Are excited with the proposal.
Wonder why you arent enough for your partner.
Are willing to talk about it.
2. Looking across the room at a swing party, you see your partner in an intimate embrace. You:

Feel a little left out and uncomfortable.
Are unconcerned, because that is why you are here.
Find someone to be involved with yourself
Are furious and leave.
3. You watch your partner go into a bedroom to swing. You probably would:

Be unconcerned and continue what you are doing.
Take it for a while then go get your partner.
Find someone to swing with and/or talk with.
Become furious and distressed and take the car.
4. You are swinging and your partner enters the room to swing. You probably would:

Go on with your swinging, unconcerned.
Freeze up and suffer until they finish and leave.
Continue to swing and enjoy the sights and sounds of your mates swinging.
Leave the room.
5. Another couple invites the two of you to swing with them in a foursome. You:

Are delighted.
Would like to see if your partner agrees.
Wouldnt have anything to do with such a thing.
Would decline because of uneasiness about swinging in the same room with your partner.
6. You are in a bedroom swinging but don't enjoy your swinging partner's technique. You would:

Get up and leave the room.
Talk it over with our partner to improve mutual pleasure.
Endure the situation unhappily.
Try to shorten the experience as much as possible.
7. You are in a group sex scene and a member of your sex comes on to you sexually.

You are surprised but decide to see what happens.
You are turned off and leave the scene.
You are horrified and disgusted and say so.
It's not your thing and discreetly stop it.
8. You have often thought that you would like to swing. You are:

Afraid of venereal disease.
Afraid you'll find swinging so stimulating that you'll be dissatisfied with your partner and leave.
Afraid your partner will enjoy it more than you will.
Afraid to what your partner will think of you if you bring it up.
9. There's a wide range of age and ethnic groups in the swing club you are considering. You find this:

Stimulating
Of some concern and discomforting
Doesn't matter
A turn off and unacceptable
10. The swing club you are considering also offers social non sexual activities. This:

Increases your interest.
Is of slight interest.
Bothers you as you donut want to mix "fucking" with social activities.
Might lead to the so-called straights finding out about you and your swinging.
What was your score? Scroll down to view results

Question #

1
B
D
C
A

2
B
C
A
D

3
A
C
B
D

4
C
A
D
B

5
A
B
D
C

6
B
C
D
A

7
A
D
B
C

8
A
D
C
B

9
A
C
B
D

10
A
B
D
C

TOTAL POINTS

10-15 points: You have no hang-ups to hamper swinging You will be an exciting addition to any swing group. Openness and adventure are two words underlined in your dictionary.

16-21 points: You are pretty healthy emotionally and will enjoy swinging. You are open to new things, which is the sign of a person who is on the way to peak experiences.

22-25 points: Swinging is a pretty threatening jump for you to take. You waver between wanting to and being afraid.

26-31 points: You are likely to encounter some difficulty if you try swinging, however, it is a horizon-expanding journey and could be beneficial to you if you are open for it.

32-35 points: Swinging would offer too many contradictions to your restricted moralistic behavior. You have often thought of swinging, but have quickly pushed it to the back of the bus.

36-40 points: Swinging is definitely not for you. Fantasies and clandestine affairs are more your thing.

HOW DID YOU GET STARTED?
Bob came home one day and asked me if I had ever considered swinging. I asked him "swinging what?", thinking he was talking about a swingset. Little did I know! He then proceeded to dig out a few magazines he had picked up and asked if perhaps I might be interested. This was the first time I had heard that people actually did this. I was a bit taken back, but curious nevertheless.

He told me he had been talking online with a couple (B & F) and they wanted to meet us. He promised we could go meet them and then go home. There was no commitment on either of our parts. My initial reaction was I was scared to death, but Bob said B was very nice and bi and said if I just wanted to talk to her first to call. Interest was sparked. Bob called and handed me the phone. I was reassured by B that we would simply meet for dinner, no commitments. She told me a bit about her. Mainly that she was bi and that intrigued me. I had several bi relationships in the past and the idea of the bi experiences with Bob watching excited me. A few days later, we met them for dinner.

I think it took me 3 hours to figure out what to wear for dinner. I hadn't been this nervous since High School. We arrived at the restaurant and B & F had a hug and a rose bud for me. We easily fell into a wonderful conversation about their adventures in the lifestyle. When it was time to leave, I was sorry to say good bye. We hugged and kissed in the parking lot and made promises to get together soon.

The next weekend B & F invited us to their home for dinner and to watch a movie. This time I was nervous again, but also excited. We had a great relaxing dinner and afterwards F asked me if I would feel comfortable watching an x rated movie. I assured him that I would enjoy it. As we sat in the living room watching the hot scenes on the TV screen. B & F started to caress each other, while Bob and I snuggled and watch with interest. Soon Betsy told me that she gives great massages and had wonderful oils. She asked if she could give me a massage. After I said yes she took my hand and we went into the bedroom where she lit some candles and had me lay down on the bed. She slowly took off my blouse and skirt, leaving on my bra and underwear so I would feel comfortable. When things started to heat up, the guys wandered down the hall and asked if they could join us. By this time, I didn't hesitate one minute!

After this great evening, we were together many times. We had dinner at each other's homes, went to movies together, out to the theater and to restaurants. We developed a great friendship that the sex just enhanced. B & F introduced us to more of their friends and soon our social calendar exploded and we were invited to our first house party.

This next step was another stretch for me. There would be a dozen or so couples there. We called the host and hostess up and said we would like to come to the party but this would be our first party. They invited us over for coffee to meet them ahead of time. D & MJ were great at making us feel comfortable. They explained to us about their experiences in the lifestyle and what to expect at the party. They also told us that if we didnt want to do anything, we simply needed to say no.

It took me probably 6 hours this time to pick out what to wear! We arrived for the party and D & MJ introduced us to several people there. B & F stayed by our sides making sure we were comfortable. We didnt do much that first evening but watch. But boy oh boy what interesting sites. At one point, we glanced into the living room and couldn't believe the sites we saw. Not once throughout the evening did we feel pressured into doing anything we didn't want to. When I was asked to participate, I simply said I was taking baby steps and not quite ready to jump in yet. When we went home, we had the most incredible evening of lovemaking.

After our first party, we felt that this was the right thing for us. The people we had met so far were the warmest, friendliest folks we had ever met.

DON'T YOU GET JEALOUS AT ALL?
There is nothing for us to be jealous about. Neither of us are looking for anyone to replace the other. This is something we do together.as a couple. It takes a while before you "get it" What we mean is that it takes a while before you understand that when we are playing with other people, there are no emotions involved. Bob is fond of saying that only he makes love to me. This is true for both of us. It's just all about fun, its just sex, recreational sex. Bob also says that its our hobby, we don't like to build model airplanes or collect stamps. We both love sex.

I JUST WANT TO BE WITH ANOTHER WOMAN, IS THAT OK?
When we began this lifestyle, that's what I wanted too. There are many couples in which the wife wants to play with another woman and just have the husbands watch. It depends on what the other people's rules are. Bob and I had a set of rules that we constantly revised and in fact still revise. But communication is the key. Talk , talk , talk. In fact, I think one of the greatest benefits of being in the lifestyle is your increased ability to talk with your partner. Its important that you set up some guidelines for yourselves. The most important things is to be upfront with the people you meet so that you do not lead them on. Most everyone is understanding and remember, we were all new once.

TELL ME ABOUT CANDLELIGHT..WHAT GOES ON THERE?
CandleLight Associates is an adult club. There are a lot of misconceptions about what goes on there. Most people think you walk in the door and there are people having sex all over the place. That is not true at all.

CandleLight Associates is more like any other dance clubexcept the dancing is much hotter!

The energy level is amazing and there is the feeling of freedom unlike anything you have ever experienced.

WHAT IF I SEE SOMEONE I KNOW THERE?
Remember they are there for the same reason you are. Discretion is of the utmost importance to anyone in the lifestyle. There is a common bond that is evident and everyone respects everyone else's privacy. No one advertises that they are or that anyone else is a member.

HOW DO I MEET PEOPLE AT THE CLUB?
It is a very social atmosphere. Everyone in very friendly. For the first-timer, it may seem cliquish, but that is only because there are many regulars and they know each other. Our members make a genuine effort to meet the new folks. We have themes for our parties and its always a good conversation starter. Also participate in the mingle games we play. We always a have social orientation at 7 pm the evening of the party. This is required for new people to attend, but its also a great way to meet people in a smaller group. You just have to be a little social. Sometimes you meet people just on the dance floor. A look, a smile..or even a soft brush often begins a conversation. It's easy to make friends and meet new people.

MY HUSBAND WON'T FEEL COMFORTABLE IF ANOTHER MAN APPROACHES ME. HOW DO WE HANDLE THAT?
It's an unwritten rule that women rule in the lifestyle. One of the best parts about going to a club is that they are not "meat markets" like all the other straight clubs. Most men are not aggressive, even the single men and people generally move about as a couple. There are exceptions as there are to any rule.

IS IT OKAY IF WE DON'T "DO" ANYTHING?
The golden rule of our club and any other lifestyle event or club that I've ever been to has always been the "No means No." Before you attend any event, you must communicate with each other and set up some ground rules and a way to signal to your partner if you want to proceed or if you don't! It is very important to set up your ground rules so no one is put on the spot if a situation comes up. Take small steps, don't leap into anything that makes you feel uncomfortable. Many people will attend a dance and that's it. Just the situation of being there and watching the crowd is very erotic and makes for a fun evening when the two of you get home. No one is keeping a scorecard on you.

WHAT ARE YOUR RULES FOR EACH OTHER?
Our rules change as we are in the lifestyle longer, yours will too. One of our first rules was that no matter what we did during the evening, we always ended it in each other arms. We also make sure that the other is comfortable with the couple before we do anything. We have a secret code word that we use to give the go ahead to each other. LOL We like to play together within arms reach of each other, but its not a die cast rule. It might be for you and it used to be for us in the beginning. We don't do "mercy fucks". If Bob is dying for the woman in the couple and I just don't get along with the guy, we'll pass. We never say why, just no thank you. We've found when you try to explain, that's what leads to ill feelings. We always use condoms with other partners.

You'll have to discuss what's good for you and make your own set of rules.

MY WIFE IS NOT INTERESTED. HOW CAN I GET HER TO THE CLUB?
You can't, if she is not interested in going. That is not to say that there are not ways to bring it up in conversation. Perhaps you can tell her about the lifestyle. Remember its something you want to explore together. We firmly believe that "Swingers don't Cheat and Cheaters don't Swing." Perhaps find out how she feels about going and just observing and I will be glad to talk with her if she has questions.

In my experience, there are two types of couples who go to the clubs:

Couples very much in love and who wish to explore new experiences
Couples whose marriage is on the rocks and who think this lifestyle will fix things
#2 never works.

WHAT ABOUT SINGLE MEN?
We are one of the few clubs that will invite single gentlemen to our club. We have specific guidelines for them and limit the number, keeping a close eye on the ratio. There is definitely a place in the lifestyle for single males. There is also a vast majority of single men who believe in "The Myth." The myth is that all swingers want a single male to join them. The truth is that there are a few, but they are only a percentage.

We demand that the single men who attend our dances are respectful and understand how often couples are bothered by rude single males. To find out more about our philosophy, read my article entitled "Single Men Do Meet Couples".

I AM A SINGLE MALE. CAN YOU SET ME UP WITH A SINGLE GIRL IN THE LIFESTYLE?
This might be the #1 most asked question. No we can't do this. Attend the dances, smile, be respectful, be honest, maybe it will happen.

CAN WE FIND SINGLE BI-FEMALES AT THE CLUB?
And this is #2. Yes, there are some single females there, but they are unique like unicorns. Some are looking for couples, some are just looking to meet other females. If you are interested in just female play, it is a lot easier to find a couple just like yourselves who are into just "female play" where the men don't participate.

WHAT ABOUT HIV?
We all know that the AIDS virus is transmitted through body fluids. The only way to be sure you're safe is never to have sex at all! (and don't use IV drug, etc.) However, we know that's not reality! If you agree to both use condoms, that will not totally eliminate the risk. It will help, but you need to also consider using dental dams, condoms or saran wrap when having oral sex as well. (What if you have a cut in your mouth and you have oral sex with an infected person?) A lot of couples today are deciding not to have any intercourse with other people to be safer. It's a life and death decision that you're dealing with here, so don't belittle it. Some couples say that you have just as good a chance of being hit by a bus, and maybe they're right. However, why would you take a risk that you could avoid so simply? You are talking about your lives, you know.

I have found that within the lifestyle most people do take precautions and those that don't are often shunned. But this is a personal decision and neither Bob nor I can or will police what you do privately.

IS EVERYONE GORGEOUS IN THE LIFESTYLE?
Boy, was this a big question for me when I got started! The answer is no. I am a BBW and Bob is not Ken, but we've done just fine. Most swingers are regular people. We all take very good care of ourselves, but the average age of the lifestyler is 30-50 ish. Our advice to you is this: we understand that you are concerned about how you look, but if you are considering swinging, make friends first. It's a lot more comfortable to be friends than just doing people you don't know.

HOW DID THE CLUB GET STARTED?
After we attended our first party, things spiraled. We met more and more folks and become more and more popular. D & MJ became great friends. D & MJ continued to have parties in their home every other month and started to have parties on their off month. Our last house party was over 50 people. A bit large for our home!. We decided along with D & MJ to start a club together and to rent a facility in which to hold parties.

Thus the birth of CandleLight Associates. We became popular quickly. D & MJ then decided to move out of the area. Bob and I continued with CandleLight. The club has changed in recent years. We started out meeting in townhouses. There was no dance area, just friendly folks. Today we have over 350 member couples. We continue to listen to our members advice. And we still believe that our members make the club.

COUPLESNIGHTCLUB.COM   
MEET SEXY OPEN-MINDED FRIENDS
Fun Off Premise Club. Saturday: Couples Meet Couples, Fridays: Couples
& Singles Meet.Ladies meet ladies free cover. www.couplesnightclub.com
We opened in 1991 were now 25,000 members strong.

Couples At Heaven   
Couples at Heaven is the new Thursday party for couples and single females.3 floors of Djs,Dancing and lighting with a special V.I.P. bar on the 3rd floor.Each floor has its own bar and clean bathrooms.We offer a sexy cool vibe with a friendly staff and beautifull bartenders.Weekly contests and theme parties 21 for men and 18 for females valid I.D. is a must.This is a off premise party with a cash bar no BYOB here.Our grand opening will be Jan 13th 05.

Couples Events   
CouplesEvents is a private adult members-only couples forum. Our mission is to promote and express our sexual freedom in a safe, fun and sensual environment while educating our member community and supporting alternative lifestyles.

We are here to educate, amuse, enrich and have fun! Explore and ask questions that you have always wanted to ask. Plus join our members-only events with quality couples just like you!

We're a Manhattan based on-premise couples-only private forum servicing the exclusive NY Metro and tri-state lifestyle communities.

Our members are in their early 20s through mid 40s, attractive, fit, upscale, stylish, and sophisticated. CouplesEvents is all about safe, fun and sensual exploration of all kinds, from those who just want to flirt and hang out with uninhibited sexy people, to those who are interested in more intimate gatherings. We don't judge and we encourage a no pressure environment.

We appreciate your interest in joining our private and exclusive members-only forum and we hope to see you real soon!

CouplesEvents parties are held at luxurious spaces in Manhattan, NY, with no hassle access to all public transportation; plus there is ample free parking.

We do not give out the actual locations until we receive your RSVP and membership / verification. This works to safeguard our exclusive events, protect your privacy and eliminate any gate crashers (i.e. single men)! One of our sexy staff will review your information (which is kept strictly confidential) to determine whether you can play with us. All who attend our events are screened and must become members of our private forum to attend any events. Clicking the "Bookings" Tab, will direct you to our membership application. After you submit your information and are approved, we will notify you of the next step.

Member Feedback

Don't Listen to Us, Just Read What Our Member Guests have to say about their stay at CouplesEvents:

--- "Great Party. Went to the CE party last night - brilliant!! Best space for
swinging plus a live DJ, no funky security getting in - the hosts are charming and make an effort to introduce people around. We have been to them all: One Leg, Private List, DD, etc. and they are all good, but this had a special character --- M and SB"

--- "Had a Great Time! Thank you so much for the personal message just another of the little touches that makes your group so special. We had a great time Saturday night. You guys are wonderful hosts. Your attentiveness to each guest makes all the difference in the kind of experience you offer. Every one of your staff members are also special and memorable people who help to make everyone feel comfortable and at ease. We really felt like we were guests in your own home. And what a space! Overall, yours is far and above the best party weve ever been to. To call it a forum just doesnt do it justice. We feel like our search for a couples home is finally over. ...there was quality. We have already begun to rave about you to some of our more select friends.. We are looking forward to seeing you all again and getting to know everyone better. Thank you, again, for making the holiday weekend a special one."

--- "you have managed to put together the most awesome party. You have the best music, the most attractive and friendly hosts, very good ambience and the best mattresses!"

--- "Yes what a great party and good looking group of people. We Will be returning very soon. The Host and Hostess do a great job there. Everyone should give this new spot a try!!!"

--- "We would like to thank CouplesEvents and personaly the hosts for putting together last night's party. It was great! Everyone had tons of fun! Great venue! You sure put a lot of work into organizing the party. And the girls were lovely! :) It was great to see many new faces. Nice to meet new people and see some "old" ones! Great job! Keep it up! We'll see everyone next time!"

--- "We had a great time Saturday and we certainly thank you for organizing this. It was great to meet you and you can be sure that we will be back. It was definitely worth the trip (from CT)."

--- "We had a great time last night, it was sexy, comfortable, fun and very importantly, safe. We are happy to have found you and look forward to future parties. You are both great hosts! The swing was so much fun...can't wait to see the pics!!"

--- "Many kudos on your upbeat and inclusive approach. That, combined with such a sexy and inviting environment, really made it easy for everyone to relax and begin to mingle."

--- "What is your policy on members attending singly? I know it varies from group to group, but if it's possible, I would certainly feel comfortable, given the environment, showing up on my own." --- from a single gal one Saturday night (she joined us for some fun :-)

--- "We should be the ones thanking u...we all had a great time.... it was fantastic...great looking group of people and all are so nice..... we will definitely be returning soon!!!!"

When do you open and close?

Doors open to members 10:30pm 2:00am while the events continue untill the last couple leaves.

How can I attend CouplesEvents functions?

First time member guests must email and RSVP for each event. We highly recommended that you RSVP 1 week or more before a party. We accomadate members on a first come first served basi; an early RSVP will ensure admission! Send your email to RSVP@CouplesEvents.org

What is CouplesEvents? And how was it founded?

We're a private, high quality and exclusive members only organization seving the NY metro area; we're never open to the general public. We're run by couples in the lifestyle that are social and fun hosts catering to all your needs. We only serve couples and single women.

We founded CouplesEvents out of the frustrating experiences in online chatrooms, couples sites and online groups. We quickly learned that many people were not what they communicated even in pictures emailed to us and otherwise. Some meetings from online efforts were a disaster and few and far between were productive and fun. We knew that there had to be a better way. So we founded CouplesEvents.

What are some of the amenities you offer?

We provide a fun, clean and secure no pressure environment. In short we provide our members all they need to for an unforgettable night out. Everything from the right music to set the mood to a hot pre-screend members only events, please BYO. We promise you that our vounteer hosts will be among the coolest and hottest you'll encounter.

You'll find that our venues are recently renovated, clean and and enticing spaces, with accomdatations to suit your needs.

What is the dress code?

Please feel free to dress as sexy as you dare. Dress to impress and look your best. No sneakers, jeans or t-shirts allowed.

Why do you "screen" new members?

CouplesEvents are privately hosted functions that are not open to the public and membership is required to join our special group of quality couples. After 2 G-rated photos are emailed to RSVP@CouplesEvents.org to confirm that you are a couple, instructions are then sent coupled with a phone number to call for more information.

Where are you located?
A: We're located in the heart of Manhattan, NY. And we're convienently close to all public transportation from trains to cabs and more 24/7.

How about parking? Do you have it and is it safe?
A: There is free street parking near by. And if you like you may opt for public garages too --- let us know and we'll forward you more on that upon your RSVP.

Come join our smart and sexy couples; taste a little piece of heaven right here in NYC's elite exclusive members-only CouplesEvents functions.